Gratitude Beyond Thanksgiving: A Practice, Not a Holiday
- Laura Haywood
- Nov 4
- 4 min read
Every November, gratitude takes center stage. People go around the table, say what they’re thankful for and, by December, it’s back to business as usual.
But real gratitude isn’t a seasonal buzz word. It’s not something you perform once a year. It’s a practice. A quiet, ongoing choice to notice what’s here, even when life feels messy, challenging or uncertain. When you start treating gratitude as a way of being, not just a holiday tradition, things change. It’s hard to be resentful or annoyed if you are genuinely appreciating what’s good around you.
Why Gratitude Matters
Let’s start with what it’s not. Gratitude isn’t about pretending everything’s fine all the time, or forcing yourself to “stay positive”.
True gratitude has more depth than that. It’s the ability to acknowledge what’s hard and still see what’s holding you. It’s “this hurts and I’m still able to see some good around me and feel grateful for things.”
Science backs it up. Studies show that gratitude, as a way of being, can rewire the brain, lower stress, and boost resilience. And beyond the data, it just feels different. When you live with gratitude, your energy shifts. You stop chasing “more” for the sake of it, and start seeing what’s already enough.
The Subtle Power of Perspective
When clients tell me they feel stuck, I often invite them to pause and get still, and to start to notice and become aware.
Gratitude changes your lens. Instead of focusing on what’s missing, you start seeing what’s present. Instead of focusing on what you don’t have, or can’t do, focus on what you do have, and what you can do. That small shift, from lack to presence, creates breathing room and appreciation. It stops you focusing on the negative as much, and gets you focusing on the good more, the things you do have and can do. It doesn’t always have to be big things, it can be the simplest amazing sky, a great cup of tea, friends, your dog doing something silly... Having gratitude, and noticing what’s around you keeps you more present and grounded.
In that space new possibilities appear. You respond differently. You see options where before you only saw obstacles. In coaching terms, awareness creates choice, and gratitude can fuel that awareness.
It’s not about denying the dark; it’s about remembering there’s still light. What you focus on grows, so focus more on what you have and what you can do! It's about embracing a new perspective to get you out of the stuckness of focusing on what isn't, and focusing on what is, to move forward with appreciation & hope.
Gratitude as a Practice (Real Life, Not IG Life)
Forget the perfect gratitude journal or the color-coded “thankful list.” These don't work for everyone. Gratitude lives in the small, real moments of your day and the ordinary pauses where presence slips in.
Try this:
The 30-second gratitude pause. When your mind’s racing, stop and find one thing in your immediate surroundings to appreciate. It could be a warm mug, a dog snoring, a deep breath that reaches your toes
'Thank you for the lesson', even if you don’t quite know what it is yet. Some experiences don’t feel good, but they grow you in ways comfort never could
Gratitude for the friction. The people who push your buttons provide opportunities to learn and grow
Thanksgiving as a Reminder, Not a Deadline
Thanksgiving can be a beautiful reminder, but it’s not the finish line. It’s the invitation to enter a practice, not just a yearly event.
What if this year, instead of gratitude showing up at one meal, you let it spill into the days after?
Let it be a way of noticing the ordinary and the beauty. It could be your morning quiet, your breath, the fact that you’re still here and still growing. Gratitude isn’t about having it all, it’s about realizing you already have enough to begin.
And from that grounded place, you move differently. You speak with more care, listen with more presence, notice more beauty, and handle the chaos with a steadier heart.
An Invitation to You
Here’s your reflection:
What are you grateful to have learned this year? Not gained, but learned.
Maybe it’s how strong you really are. Maybe it’s who shows up when things fall apart. Maybe it’s that even when you don’t have control, you still have choice.
Further work for you
Try thinking of three things you are grateful for every day, whether it’s first thing in the morning, last thing at night, or at some point during your day. Make the time!
Practice till it sticks!!!
Gratitude isn’t about the big wins. It’s the practice of coming home, to yourself, your life, what’s already working and what can grow more. Imagine what could shift if gratitude became your baseline, not your yearly event.
I’m grateful to you all! For reading my blogs. Please reach out if you have questions or comments!
Happy Holidays!
Laura is an ICF professional, certified life coach. She is passionate about helping people get unstuck & out of their own way. As a previous therapist, and now coach-for-life, Laura brings deep insight, experience and appreciation for people wanting to move forward with meaningful change. If you are looking for a coach to help you shine in the world, then reach out for a free discovery call, to see how coaching with Laura could help you. Rooted in therapy, powered by coaching, focused on you!
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